Forgetting About The World

Forgetting About The World
Copyright all rights reserved to Monica Pereira 2013
Smashwords Edition

I look all around and I see dark spaces and shadows that scare me.  I look and I see a place that is filled with death.  I breathe in the air, and sure it is clean enough; however it is not pure -  there is death on the air and I can sense it, I can almost breathe in the scent of washed down blood as I draw in another breath.  I take a look at the city and think how it is a death hole and that there is nothing good in it -  it is just a big fat orb of death that rolls every soul down a cart.  I shiver!  Sometimes I scare myself as I think about things dark and deadly, however that is what the city is like and I quickly take my steps home.


I reach my home -  it is an apartment down the street, and I feel relief as I reach it.  I walk into the home and I take a seat; I enjoy the sensation of being greeted by a heater as the dewy wind has left me feeling a tad bit too cool.  I take an apple from the basket and I begin to chew on it -  it is nice, crunchy, and sweet, and I think how good it is.

I walk to my room and then I turn on the television -  it shows only bad TV shows and I turn the volume off as I watch it.  I don't always feel like listening to the television so I just watch the on-screen motion.  I don't really care about it all that much, it is just a waste of time for me.

I usually spend my spare time watching television shows and it makes me forget about the world outside.  I don't usually want to think about the world as it has nothing which I want to see.  I just want to forget about it, so I watch television to zone out of the world and zone into my own world.  With the volume off I make my own scripts over what I see, and I enjoy it -  I play with my psyche until I am lost in my own realm; I like it that way.


A knock on the door breaks my attention and I take a look to my right to see my mother Sue as she looks at me.  She inspects me with her stare and then she leaves me alone, no word is spoken, and I shrug before I let my ideas go.

I don't know what to think when I meet a moment of queer, and that moment as Sue looked at me was one moment of queer.  I float an idea around my mind but I don't want to think for very long -  I just want to concentrate on anything else, and I forget so that I can recall nothing.

I look at the screen and see a few base characters as they act out some play.  I want to begin a script to make them talk -  however I zone out and just watch the movement; I think how I am bored as sit and watch the movement -  nothing comes into my mind, I stay blank.


An hour passes and I smell dinner on the table.  I smell the reek and think how hungry I am.  I decide to stop watching the television show before I move to inspect the food.  

I see the table has been set with bread and salad, and I begin to eat the meal.  However there is still hot food yet to come in the form of cooked stew.  I wait for the food as I nibble on bread and salad -  it is good to be able to fill myself, however as soon as the family arrive I discover the real food which comes in the form of thick stew.

I munch and gobble on the warm food until I feel good.  Then I eat some more bread, before I go back to my room.


Inside of my room I sit and look at the television – there is nothing much going on, but I sit and watch as I think how warm my belly feels.  I am finally full and at home with comfort.  I don't ever want to leave, nor do I ever want to even look outside for there is nothing I want to remember out there. 

“I feel so much better here;”  I say to myself as I watch television and feel apart from the world.  “This is how it is supposed to be;”  I add as I fill my vision up with characters until it is time to go to sleep.


An hour later I shower and slip into bed.  In bed I watch a little more television before I fall into a comfortable sleep.  I rest in my bed and I forget about the world yet again -  I do not wake, I only sleep, and I disappear from the world as I feel at home for the last time in one day.